If you are involved in leading executive teams, the sale of product
or services, or teaching, you need the knowledge in a 15 year old book called Emotonal Intelligence, by Daniel Golemen.
So What
Fact: decision-making is only 20% logical and reasonable, and 80%
emotional. If you have not connected with the feelings of the person
you want to influence, persuade or convince – you fail.
Fact: decision-making requires seeing in your mind's eye owning and
enjoying the new product or service. Mental movies involve your right-
hemisphere – the seat of emotions and pattern recognition. No picture,
then no – Yes-decision.
The brain operates chemically and decides through mental imagery (pictures)
using our Limbic System (emotions).
Name Memory
If you want to alienate clients, avoid new social relationships and make enemies,
just mispronounce or fail to remember their name. It is a high-order insult.
Most of the memory tricks to remember names is too complicated for folks who
have a life. Here are a few that are easy-as-pie and really work in the real world.
1. Affirmation: if you mentally repeat three-times – "I Am Remembering
the names of people I meet today because it is important to my career,"
your attention is fixed on this goal.
Enter the room and quickly repeat 3x – "I am remembering the names of people I meet today because it is important to my career." Your non-conscious mind doubles your concentration to enhance this behavior.
1. As-If: If you Think-Feel-Act As-If you have a great working memory,
your brain accepts the challenge and makes it a reality. Thinking and feeling
so, in fact helps make it so. You activate your attention and concentration.
Make-believe you are an Actor and choose to influence and convince others.
1. Crazy but true: imagine the name of the person you meet Printed on their
forehead in large-sized letters. Repeat it silently as you read it from his/her
forehead – three-times and you own it.
1. Rhyming-Simon: John F. Kennedy used this memory trick to recall the names of folks he met daily. The name of his speed reading teacher was
2. Elton Y. Mears. He associated the name Elton with Elvis, Y with the symbol for a question, and he mentally imagined the professor with Big Ears! He whispered mentally (internal dialogue) "Professor Mears has Dumbo's big-ears!"
He never forgot Dr. Mears' name because he associated it with Disney's
character – Dumbo's gigantic ears. The rhyme makes it easy and fun.
Seven Ways to Get Folks to Hate You – Forever
First off, figure out how to remember these dangerous characteristics.
a) Blaming b) bribing c) complaining d) criticizing e) nagging
f) punishing g) threatening
Answer: put them in alphabetical order – B comes before C etc. Next,
create a simple, baby-easy mental picture of each negative tactic.
Example: "You did it. It is your fault. You're guilty!" Blaming.
Bribing: picture patting someone on the back and smiling at them, when
you would rather strangle them. We bribe others by false praise, not just
with filthy lucre.
See yourself filing a report Complaining about their behavior. Create your
own imagery (mental-pictures) with the last four. It is easy will stick like glue.
Remember this, when someone says to you, "please tell me the honest truth
about my article, speech or talent, folks will never, I mean NEVER, forget or
forgive your Criticism – especially if it is true. They will hate you forever.
If you are a parent and tell the truth (negative criticism) to your child,
it will require five-years of therapy from a certified psychiatrist to wipe
out their anger and hatred.
School
In a recent research study of attitudes toward school – in excess of 90%
admitted they HATED almost every day in class, and each of their teachers.
You are not supposed to admit you hate school because it is a principle of
faith in our left-brain Knowledge Economy that all you have came through
education. Maybe not, I would be bet on experience.
Why do we hate school and remember it as torture? Answer:
We were always in a subordinate, inferior, submissive position. How do you
like feeling humble and being controlled?
The teacher is the dominant person, top-dog, and master. That make us the
slave, subordinate and controlled, right?
So What
When we have negative feelings and moods our ability to learn and remember
is reduced up to 25%. How do you feel in an adult situation when others are
judging you leading to a positive or negative review?
Emotional intelligence requires a self-understanding and a powerful under-
standing of how others react to you. Mood and emotions are formed based
on how we see others treating us: we see their facial expressions, gestures,
posture and body language.
We copy what we see in others. Emotions are like a virus or the flu, it is
"catching". When we smile and are outgoing – it affects others in how they
react to learning and memory.
Endwords:
There is more practical, useful knowledge in the book Emotional Intelligence
than two more college degrees. Check it out.
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Would it give you a competitive advantage to read-and-remember three (3)
books, articles and reports in the time others can hardly finish one?
Would it affect you studies and career?
Request our free –no strings attached report on Speed Reading. It can change
your life for the better.
See ya,
copyright © 2010 H. Bernard Wechsler
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